Blink And You'll Mess It - Kjaer Weis Mascara

Just like the foundation (review here), the Kjaer Weis Mascara arrived from Content housed in one of the brand's signature blood-red boxes.




Now, a bit of accidental wand to face contact is of course to be expected when applying mascara, unless you're a total pro (I'm not), but even if I do manage to get this stuff on my lashes (no mean feat considering how thick and wet the formula is) as soon as I blink, it transfers, above and below my eye. It doesn't matter how painstakingly you apply; I even tried that whole "hold a card behind your lashes" trick and I still managed to get it on my eyelid! Somehow it's even worse whenever I curl my lashes, which is most days.

After a lot of trial and error (mostly error), I got so fed up of having it smear across my eyelid, that I retired this mascara indefinitely. And there it languished at the back of my make-up drawer until quite recently. Weeks of non-use meant that the formula had dried out just enough to make application a bit easier so I decided to risk wearing it to college one particularly wet and windy winter's morning. You can see where this is going, can't you?

As I took my seat, I could tell that something was wrong. The two girls to the left of me were looking at me with rather strange expressions on their perfectly made-up faces (I later recognised this as pity) and when another girl sat on my right, she took one look at me and started fiddling with her own make-up. Immediately suspicious but with no pocket mirror to hand (and far too embarrassed to whip out my phone to use the front-facing camera in front of the whole class), I had to sit through the lecture in agony and rush to the bathroom as soon as it was over to survey the damage. Oh boy. It was EVERYWHERE. The mascara had smudged all around my eye area, leaving me with the very definition of "Panda Eyes". Now I feel it only fair to point out that Kjaer Weis do not actually market this mascara as waterproof (with good reason obviously) but not only had it smudged, it had flaked; I mean, there was more mascara on my face than there was left on my lashes.


And it's not just the formula I have a problem with. Part of the appeal of this product (and the entire Kjaer Weis brand) is the glamorous exterior, but in real life, the packaging isn't exactly practical. For one thing, the tube is quite small and not the most comfortable to hold given its unusual shape. The cap doesn't quite align with the bottom when you twist it shut, which takes away from the overall effect, and the finishing means that there is just no avoiding getting fingerprints all over it. Not what you want from a mascara that retails at £33.

I feel like I have to say something good about this product. If only because I spent my birthday money on it. So here it is: it's jet black. Not enough? Well, while it's not really any good at holding a curl or giving volume, it could definitely be described as lengthening. And, as with the foundation, you have the option of purchasing refills. It's also easy enough to remove with just your regular old cleanser.

So, to sum up, I'd rather go without mascara than wear this, which is what I have been doing lately. And coming from a girl who's worn mascara pretty much every day for the past ten years, I think that says quite a lot, don't you?